Surprise!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHEORIC! hahaha

This morning I had mass com presentation! So funny! Wan hong said I was cute. ==" Well, I take that as a compliment. At least people laugh during my presentation lo. SoI think it was pretty good la. Glad that its over.

We planned to gave Pheoric a surprise in class. So at the end of the class, I stepped out and announce to everyone "Hey guys! Today's our little friend, Pheoric's birthday! let's sing him a song shall we?" and Fawn come with his with favourite Secret Recipe Marble cheese and American Cheese! Lucky him!

We went 1u after class. Had lunch @ Chilli's. STILL SO FULL! I pakat with the manager there and we surprise him with another birthday cake sponsored by Chilli's! haha Hope he feel touch la, though he claim he dont feel anything. ==""

I shouldnt be spending ANY money in shopping in this 2 weeks. But I did! Thats why I left with ker yi and Pheoric while the girls continue shopping. No no no no, I must control myself! hmmm...

I definitely spending A LOT in foods! "You ar, like spoiled kid! always want to eat good food!" My mum was probably right. haha Dont know, I dont really care how much a meal cost me, as long as its delicious! I will have second thought while shopping, but not in food! =)

Will be having lunch at Shushi Zanmai with high schools besties tomorrow!
And attend a SPECIAL dinner with some SPECIAL friends in a SPECIAL place!
Cant wait for tomorrow, it's gonna be a GOOD GOOD day!

XOXO,
You know you love me, Phebsy

Before its too late

Just Stop it!

I’m so sick! I got my fever back! I hate being sick because I can got very frustrated. And I got very annoyed and frustrated when people say things that bother me very much, esp when I’m that sick!! You’re the most inconsiderate man on earth I ever seen! Go eat grass la! Who the hell you are here to judge me?! Scold me?! You thought I never know that you used me?! I help you because we’re friends, at least I still consider you as one. I hate you so badly for fooling me, playing me and using me!

I keep it all inside and I said nothing to you. But if you still doing this to me, I’ll do something back as return. I can get as mean as you could never ever imagine. I wasn’t grown up in a place that people put me as their first priority, I’m not the princess. Since kid, I knew with a face like that and a body like that, I’m just nothing. Despite of what I’m capable, people treat me as trash. And what do people do to trash? They ignore, they stay away, they spit, they trample, they scorn… I’m turning 20 this year, its more than enough living in a world where people don’t appreciate me.

You know why serial killer kill? Because they were abandoned, were hurt by their loves one, were despise by the society... because people around them kept doing things to hurt them. So stop doing whatever you’re doing now, because I’m telling you for sure that, one day I would get insane and the first person I’ll kill is YOU.

** For your record, I'm not drunk. I'm just being serious.

Dilemma

My birthday is coming! (in 6 months) Lols

So, Mummy have put up some option for my birthday present for this year.

So, I gotta choose one of below

A. ACER Ferrari

B. Toy poddle

C. An Alza in black

D. iPhone 4G

E. Another guinea pig (to accompany FeeFee - my existing guinea pig)

Who wouldnt have a dilemma with choices like that?!

My mum is so evil! ==

Well I have 6 more months to consider! Till then

XOXO

You know you love me, phebsy

R.I.P. Grandpa

Aunty called me today. I was shocked to hear the news. He was always so fit, so healthy and so humor. I was very sick, still now. But I know the family need me more than anyone else. I went to BJ’s house around 5pm after hanging out with Fawn and the rest at Lab.

The atmosphere of the house was, was like typical funeral. Everyone’s wearing white, tables set out at garage, flowers and banners around the main gate. I walked in and gave a hug to aunty. We talked for a while and she said BJ had been in the room since y’day, not eating. Aunty was very worried. I walked upstairs, knocked the door, and went in to his room. He wasn’t on his bed and it was tidy. I turned around and there he was, sitting on the couch facing TV. I sat beside him and hold his hand, he leaned on my shoulder. His tears dropped on my shoulder and I said nothing but hold his hand tighter and pat his head. I don’t know how long we’ve sit there, but he finally slept. I looked around the room and he still has our photos in frame on the tables, beside his bed, on his book shelves. And I thought he moved on, and started dating with that girl. But none of her picture was there.

Aunty came in and called for supper. She told me a lot of stories, which I still can’t believe. I know then, he didn’t tell his parents about us, breaking up. His mom figured out eventually but dad still believes we’re together. When I asked Aunty about the girl he’s dating right now, she said he never did fell into that girl but just to show to me that he moved on. I backed to his room and saw him looking at his childhood album with his grands. I walked to him and sat right beside him. The moment I hold his hand, I knew I would never want to let go of him, again. I try to hold my tears, and tell him stories, funny moments we used to share. He was the only person that didn’t laugh because of my sexy voice. In fact, he holds my hand with his both hands and said don’t leave. My heart paused for a while. Who would want to leave this poor fella like this alone. I know I wouldnt, ever.

BJ’s grandpa was a humor person. Last time, when BJ and I were still together we used to have dinner with his family. His grandpa would always come up with jokes that could make our evenings so pleasant. I always get hyper when I know I’m gonna meet with him that day itself. He was very good to me, as if I’m his grandchild and treat me so well as if I was already one of the family. He liked me very much and tends to called me “BJ’s wife”. BJ love his grandpa so much and they were so close. The grief that he’s going through now is greater than anyone could imagine. That’s why he needs someone there with him, that’s why I’m there, right beside him. I don’t know what will this lead us to and will we be back together again or not. What I concern the most is that, to help him to stand up and to help the family to move on. That’s my role for now.

R.I.P. grandpa. Thank you for giving my so much love, caring and laughter even though we’re not related.

The Sexy One

Skipped mass com to have lunch with Rachel and Adri in Decante at Damansara. What a cheesey meal.

I got tease by a waiter, a lecturer, an experimenter, some students and friends for my super sexy voice. == I sound super bass these few days. I got picked up by a guy because of it too... I can’t concluded that he did it due to my “sexy voice” but he did asked “Do you always sound like this?” What the hell?!

Not sure he’s overfriendly or just play for fun or just simply pervert. Meet this dude from experiment. He came in and sat beside me and started talking to me?! First he started asking for my facebook and msn add. Then he asked about me, where I’m from, how old am I and stuffs. Again, he’s not the first to thought that I’m mix. Anyway, after the experiment finished, while waiting for the lift to go meet with Rachel and the rest, he came to me and asked whether I’ve taken lunch or not, wanna go bangsar for lunch? I was like what the hell?! Of course I answered politely that I’ve eaten and need to meet with friends. Thought this would send him away, but you have no idea how stubborn he could be! He then asked for my phone no, said that we could just hang out sometimes. Tak kan I say “No! You can’t have my no!” right? So I gave him, and of course, its not mine no la! I made it up. Haha.

XOXO
You know you love me, Phebsy

Stop Blaming Me

We went Tenji today for lunch. I still go though sick like hell.


Mia and Khim


Baby Chloe!



Ivan : i love mei mei so much!
Chloe : Go AWAY! Lol


The Coconutians >>>

The Cocktailsians >>>

The nanny of the day! hahahha

J'taime : Its so disgusting!

Funny Barry and So-not-in-situation Ivan.

Keep holding on

Woke up this morning and realized that ... here we go again.
My room temp is 12 'C but my body heat was definitely more than usual.
I sound like a man and my nose was flooded.

Missed group meeting.

I was like WTH in the whole session of the tutoring.
Kept cursing some people in the room.

Then, psy 106. Damnit, my fever came back and i was a mess! Pheoric, Adam and Ker yi were sitting with me and they kept asking I'm ok or not. hmmm...and there's a moment, where I was very very miserable, I cried. And I thought of just pack up and go back. but I stayed instead. I was pretty useless for the whole quiz thingy. Sorry people.

On the way back, I cried again. Felt like my head was going to crack and my body is on the boiling mode. I was so so so miserable.

Now? Better la. Since I took 100plus with salt, panadol, chinese herbal, chinese medicine... Just woke up and I drank another glass of chinese medicine that mum cook for me. Hopefully I'll be just fine since I gotta work tomorrow.

I'm going Tenji for lunch tomorrow! I gotta get well by then,no matter what! wahahaha

XOXO
You know you love me, Phebsy

The Mix One

hmm...I get it, like all the time.

During Taylor's, almost everyone thought I'm mix in that ice-breaking games.
"Huh, I thought you're a chindian?!"
"Aren't you mix?"
"Are you from somewhere like Mongolia?"

During HMC,
The counsellor - Wilson asked
"... Did you bring your photocopies of passport? We can print it here for you if you havent printed it out. And your ___ exam result?"

Kher ye asked
"Are you a foreigner?"

Fiona asked
"So which part of China you're from?"

And Fatin asked
"You know when I first saw you I was so sure you're mix or foreigner. After couple of weeks only I realized you're not."

During work,
Customers tend to asked THE SAME QUESTIONS.
"Which country you come from?"
"So do you think Malaysia's interesting? Where have you visit to?"
"Why do you come to Malaysia to work? Is your country's pay very low?"

My students asked
"Teacher are you really Australian? Because you look like one. Is your mum chinese and dad's a Asutralian."

Now, Bpsy
Orientation day,
This guy came to me and talk about stuffs. Then he asked
"By the way, do you need help for direction in KL? Here's a map for you. There's shopping malls and places where you can find foods. "

Few days ago, in LLS was grouping up with this girl beside me. We were suppose to talk about movies stuffs, that's what Justin said. So I group up with this stranger which ended up asking me
"Are you mix? Like Chinese American? You have the caucasion face."

And you know what's the most funny part? I go shopping, went in some stores, where chinese staff approach to me and ask "Boleh saya bantu keh cik?"

You can call me whatever you want me to be. A Chindian, Mongolia, China, Indonesia, Jakarta, Australian (my pleasure!) ... BUT not MALAY! ==
If a staff from any store talk to me like i'm a malay, I wont visit that store AGAIN, EVER!
I'm so overdramatic! haha


YES! I'm mix! Chinese with Australian!
Done?! Please dont ask me again. =)

XOXO
You know you love me, Phebs

The Truth

Sometimes, you figured out that she's no longer who you thought she is. The one that you've been treating like your own sister, you BFF become the most strangest person for you. Someone who's being selfish and doesnt care about your concerns.

Once again, I have no idea what's best friends for.
"I'm okay. Its ok. Never mind."
I've been saying these forever and I hardly meant it.
Best friends are like married couple. Both needs honesty. I gave mine but I dont see another side did so. Best friends required trust, and you doubt me all the time.

I'm not good enough for BJ my ex?!
I'm not good enough to study psychology?!
I'm not good enough to work certian jobs?!
I'm not good enough to dress like that?!
I'm not good enough to wear make up?!
I'm not good enough for just ... everything?!

So you said. My best friend.

I'm really sick of saying this over and over again. I was there for whoever need me, I always do. But who was there for me?!

If you've been reading my blog, you'll know what happened to me in these 2 years.
Here's the stories.

The accident I had 1 years ago, I wont never ever forget that. A motorist hit me and ran away. I was abandoned on the road, crying and yelling in pain. No one bothers.
I was hospitalized then. You never came. You never asked. You never concern, not even a sms asking "Are you ok?". I've a scar on my leg now and I'll always remember : No one cares. Not even the so called best friends.

Another accident I had last year. I was banged by a car. My ankle was wrapped. You walked pass by and I showed you my ankle with tears coming out. You showed me faceless. You said nothing. You did anything. You made me chased behind you with my ankle hurt everytime my foot touches the floor. This scar reminds me of : No one cares. Even if you're dying soon.

Some said True friends are hard to get. But is it really that hard?! I gave in everything. I've sacrificed a lot of things. So what's now? I got nothing. I got no one.

Prince of Persia

I think it was last tuesday, since some of us have 6 hours break, the rest decided to ditch class and join the bandwagon to Tropicana Mall.

Had our lunch in Sushi Tei. I had the lunch box this time! SO Full!!!
Then we went for movie - Prince of Persia! SO NICE!!!


Mia and Rachel


Bala, mia, Junn, Adam and Fawn.


Mia and junn.

-------------------------------------

Since I was already late for mass com today, thought might as well just skipped it. Walked to Subway alone and there I saw Stephanie. We had small talks about Uni, Australia and CF.
LLS class was ok. Justin let us watch the Malcom in the Middle. I used to watch the show when i was a kid back then. Oh...Frankie Muniz used to be so 'children' and look at him now - SO Man. haha

Drove to Mont Kiara right after class. Studied while waiting for Kher ye to finish her work. We went Solaris to check out Tenji. On the way back, we stopped by De pastry Chef for fruit tarts and Max Value for sushi. haha I had a pleasant evening.

I'M NOT GONNA SLEEP TILL FRIDAY.
I have 7 chapters of LLS to study and the paper is on tomorrow.
I have an essay of 3 leaders that due on this friday.
I have group meeting and discussion for mass com on wednesday.

XOXO
The risen Zombie, Phebsy

Pick-Nick

WEEeeeEEE!!! We went picnic @ Common Wealth y'day. So glad it turned out so well, except one thing. I'm not gonna talk about it cause i'll probably ended up smashing keyboard or computer.

The Drivers - Phoebe, David, Ming, Victor, Melinda, Jennifer.

We meet up @ FRIM about 8.00am. Victor lead the way to common wealth. Heavy rain on the way there. It's coldzy and drizzyling when we reach there. Awesome! Cause we're the only ones there. Normally its crowed and you have to fight for the best seat.

Vicky Mama and Baby Chloe.

Too much too much! Victor!

Mia and the sandwiches i made!

Mia and Min Qi.

Kevin - the Guitarist of the day.

"Singing I love you Lord~singing I love you lord~~~"

Ah Boy, Ming and jia yong - The gamer of the day.

Let's begin!
1st game - each team choose a person, and the gamer will tell you what to compete.

When its my turn, my challenge was - See's who have the highest pitch! HAha you know who won.

AH Boy : No MERCY for punishment!!!

SPLASHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!


Victor: Let me ride on you pls!

ATTACKKKKKK!!!!!

Baby Ivan and Baby Jordan.

Justine : FASTER TAKE! I cant hold any longer!!

Hong : I! I! I'm Captain little red hood! Lols

My poor guitar, abandoned in the middle of the jungle. T.T

Min Qi, Mia and Baby Jermaine - Trying to build a sand castle, which didnt turn up well. Hahaha

Was it Cicakman or Kick-Ass?

McDs @ Sri Damansara for Lunch.

So Satisfied with her fillet-o-fish, cone ice cream, mango-peach sundae and fries.

The BOSS. hahha

The lovely day ends there with laughters.

I'M SO LAZY!!! I've not do anything on LLS! Still, I'm planning to go for movies. ==

XOXO,

You know you love me, Phebsy.

If no one would listen

I cried. They didnt see it. As least that's what I thought, I hoped.

Sometimes, you could feel so helpless that you think God's not even there for you.

It feels like there's just you against the world.
It feels like you wanna break the walls but there's endless.
It feels like you're lost in the jungle and no matter how many times you tried, you're stuck in the same place.
It feels like you're doing this thing for good, but people blame it on you.
It feels like ... Helpless.

It feels like everyone's just so good at that thing, and I'm the only dummy.
It feels like no one cares about whatever events' going on when I gave in so much to just make everyone happy.
It feels like everyone's just so lazy and dont want to do works, God's works.
It feels like I've to pick up other's shit and eventually everyone knows where to get a scapegoat.
It feels like ... Helpless.

And what's funny was, no one was even trying to ask "Are you okay?"

XOXO
"The helpless one" Phebsy